When I started this blog 2 years ago, the purpose was to research for others and share the little bit I knew (and was learning) about the business of human trafficking. I was also exploring our role as Christians in this big mess. I knew that God didn’t want us to just hear the statistics, sigh and say, “Wow, that’s too bad.” The name of the blog, “Now You Know,” is intended to be a jumping off point. NOW. YOU.KNOW. So what will you DO now that you know? I never wanted this to be just about works. BUT once you enter into a relationship with Jesus Christ and you begin to understand His heart you WANT to DO. You WANT to LIVE OUT your faith.
So as my heart began to break for these girls (and boys) involved in human trafficking, it also began to break for the orphan. These children are at such a high risk for human trafficking and have no one to advocate for them.
The statistics are staggering.
143,000,000 ORPHANS:
“It is estimated that between 143,000,000 and 210,000,000 children are orphans. That’s at least 143 MILLION children in the world today. (Recent UNICEF report.)
To give you an idea of the enormity of this need, keep in mind that the approximate population of the US is 300,000,000; and the population of Russia is 141,800,000.)” http://harvestministry.org/orphan-stats
Sometimes, reading numbers like that mean nothing. And for awhile, I heard the numbers, but still I just kept living my life as if they didn’t exist. I can’t say that there was ONE DAY that it hit me, but I do remember one day when I was holding Aaron and just kissing his chubby cheeks and hugging him telling him I loved him and all of a sudden my heart sank. As he is giggling and drooling, feeling his mommy’s lips touch his cheeks, there are babies just like him longing for the same kind of love. The hardest part of that moment was realizing that most of these kids will never experience “being loved on” like Aaron, Caleb and Joshua experience daily. (Don’t let Caleb and Josh’s wiping of their cheek fool you, they love the LOVE). ;) They NEED it. All kids need it and too many aren’t receiving it.
So anyway, there are so many ways we can help with this problem. We can find a great organization that provides for the needs of orphans and donate to them. We can go on a short-term mission’s trip and visit these kiddos. We can get behind others we know that are adopting and help them throughout the process. Or we can actually adopt a child into our family forever. I am SURE there are thousands of other ways to help too. For our family, we thought:
A child out there needs a family. Our family needs one more child. And so our journey begins!!! We are adopting!!!!
Some of you may think we are just plain crazy, some of you may think this is great, and others may just not know WHAT to think. All of the above are ok. One thing I am learning while following God is that not everyone is going to agree with what you are doing, but amidst all of that, He gives an amazing peace when it is something He is calling you to. Dan and I are both just so excited about taking our family on this journey and living out our faith by just “being a family.”
Some people know that we have started the adoption process and this question always comes up:
“HAVE YOU GUYS WANTED TO ADOPT FOR A LONG TIME?”
Good question. Yes and No. Good answer? Probably not. J (I will answer for just me here) Ok, so I can trace back MY first thoughts to when I was 17-ish and on a mission’s trip to Russia with my youth group at church. (YEA! Breakaway!!!) I just remember my heart breaking for these kids that had no one to tuck them in at night or read them each their own story at bedtime. We were teenagers and these kids were calling us mom and dad. They were chasing after our van and crying when we left, after having lived in their orphanage for only 2 weeks. They were just longing to be loved. I vividly remember us driving away and thinking, “I wish I was older and could just take a couple of them home with me.” I would have to say that was the first time I ever THOUGHT about adoption, but obviously it wasn’t anything I was about to do at the time. After that, life went on and thoughts of adoption crept into my head here and there. Often, it was when I heard of friends adopting. Dan and I would casually say, “Maybe when our kids are older we will adopt.” What a “nice” idea, right? I read somewhere (I think it was on Steven Curtis Chapman’s Website, Show Hope) that 98% of Christians think about adopting, but only 2% follow through. That hit me hard. Why not? Why don’t they follow through? (Please don’t read into that. I don’t think that everyone needs to adopt, but I do think that all Christians do need to help the orphan in some way).
Anyway, so rewind about 2 years now. I was researching more about human trafficking and throwing “Parties with a Purpose.” The whole point of partying with a purpose was to raise awareness about human trafficking/ modern day slavery and to show others how to take the first “action steps” in advocating for these people that had no voice. I always said that I wished I could have traveled to these places and shared the love of Jesus with these people. BUT as a mom, I also had a mission field here in my house. My calling right now was to be a mom to my boys. So, basically, having the parties was my “practical” way of being a justice advocate while still being a mom full time. J As Dan and I began talking about adoption, I realized that in “just being a mom” I was able to help. How awesome!
So basically, over the last couple years, God was working on my heart as well as Dan’s and we began to feel more recently that he was calling us to adoption. As we looked into it, read about it, talked about it, and prayed about it, God really gave us a strong desire to follow through on this. So cool!
Another question we are asked is:
“WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO ADOPT FROM?”
When we first started thinking about this, we thought that we could just spin a globe with our eyes closed, stop the globe, and BAM that was where we would get our next child. We soon discovered that is not the case. J
The first decision in adoption is domestic vs. international. There is no right or wrong answer here. I think that it is just where the couple is feeling led. There is definitely a need here in America as well as overseas.
Dan and I have chosen International Adoption, but if someone from Chester County came knocking on our door with a baby in their arms we would love that too!
After deciding that we were going to pursue adopting internationally, we needed to choose a country. With so many different regulations (like number of years married, current ages of the couple, income level, age of the children available, number of trips to the country, length of time you would stay in the country for the adoption process) we were quite limited.
In short, we were “qualified” for adopting a special needs child from China or a child from Ethiopia. Now, “special needs” might just be a cleft lip or palate or a simple heart condition that could easily be fixed here in America. So now we had to decide. Which road would we travel down? It felt really hard to make this kind of decision, but we just kept praying, researching, and praying some more. Again, I don’t think that there is a right or wrong decision here. We chose ETHIOPIA! (Which is funny because at the very beginning of this process I would always talk about China or Korea or Cambodia…notice a trend? And Dan would just say something like, “Lauren, what about Africa?” Too funny ! J So now I am basically addicted to blogs about families adopting from Ethiopia, BUT I am trying not to get my heart too set on it because recently there has been a slow down of referrals coming from Ethiopia and I don’t know if that means that they will be shutting their doors to adoption at any time during this process. If that happens, I know that I will be crushed, but God totally knows the outcome and wherever we end up is where He wants us. (But I have to say that Africa has my heart already.)
*Life expectancy in Ethiopia 39 years for males and 42 years for females. The leading cause of death is communicable diseases such as malaria, typhoid, meningitis, cholera, AIDS, tuberculosis, yellow fever.
* One in ten children die before their first birthday.
* One in six children die before their fifth birthday.
* Woman have an average of 7 children and the maternal mortality rate is 1 in 14
* Ethiopia's neonatal mortality rate is one of the highest in the world - 49/1000 births with tetanus infection being the second major cause of infant/neonatal death.
* Ethiopia is one of the poorest countries in the world. Over half the population lives on less than a $1 a day. The average income in Ethiopia is US$100 a year. Almost 82% of the population lives on less than $1 a day.
* Ethiopia is home to 4-6 million orphans, or 12% of all children.
* That is the same number of children under age 18 who reside in Massachusetts, New York State, and Washington DC combined. If every parent in those places died tonight - that would be similar to Ethiopia's orphan crisis. (CRAZY! Right?)
* More than half a million of these were orphaned as a result of AIDS.
* Only 42.7% age 15 and over can read and write.
* Only 18 percent of children reach grade five. That means 82% of children don't.
*44% of the population is under 15 years old
*60% of children in Ethiopia are stunted because of malnutrition
I had to read these over and over to really grasp these statistics. Just plain crazy.
But we could look at that and say, “Ok , that is really sad, but God, I have 3 kids already, a small house, small budget, and I am pretty comfortable right now.” And let me tell you, when I am staying up until 11 pm to do paperwork and waking up at 5am to do some more, I am pretty much thinking that maybe it would just be easier to write a check. But as fast as that thought comes into my head, God just fills me with excitement about “caring for the orphans and the widows in their trouble.” (James 1:27) The process of adopting is daunting, but I think of it kind of like pregnancy. (Maybe because pregnancy isn’t “my thing.”) It is hard work while you wait, but the end is such a miracle! This time around, it is my heart that is pregnant.
So for now, this blog will be where I can record thoughts and updates. We are VERY VERY early in this process, but please just pray for us when you think about our family. While we fill out more forms and collect documents we are also brainstorming ways to fund this adoption. (Thoughts on this to come later, but in general I KNOW that God will provide and I rest in that).
I feel like there is so much more that I wanted to say (and I am sure that I will think of it in the middle of the night). I also feel like with all that I just wrote, it isn't even expressing how strongly I feel about this calling and how strongly I feel that we all are to be helping those who don't have a voice in this world. Each day, God is teaching me more about his heart and really WHY we are here. So as we start this journey, Dan and I are just praying that God will lead us. We hope that you will walk with us over the next 12-18 months (or longer!). J
This is a short little diddy that I read recently. I saved it, but I have no clue where it came from, so I may be arrested for plagiarism, sorry.
The Gospel of Adoption
The good news that orphan children need to hear is not only the fact that they will be adopted by a
loving family, but also the good news that Jesus Christ died on the cross to make it possible for them to
become adopted children of God. Our adoption by God is the ultimate expression of His love, and was the
ultimate purpose of Jesus’ life on earth and death on the cross.
